


It Will Be Okay, It Has To Be (Keubiko)

by Stagcore



Series: What Makes Us Tick (Complicated Emotions For Dummies) [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Apathy, Blood, Canon-Typical Violence, Dean Winchester Bears the Mark of Cain, Episode: s10e09 The Things We Left Behind, Guilt, Guilty Dean Winchester, M/M, Mark of Cain, Not Canon Compliant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-04
Updated: 2019-01-04
Packaged: 2019-10-02 23:44:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17273408
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stagcore/pseuds/Stagcore
Summary: Keubiko- A state of exhaustion inspired by acts of senseless violence





	It Will Be Okay, It Has To Be (Keubiko)

There is blood dripping from his knuckles. He can feel it. He can hear the rhythmic _drip...drip...drip_ as the blood lands on the wooden floor. The knife is a comforting weight in his hand. It affirms his own strength, helps him to believe that there is nothing in this world that can kill him without him putting up a damn good fight first. Like a messed up safety blanket. Truth be told he can't remember a time in his life that a weapon in his hand never comforted him. The blade makes him feel powerful, like he will never be vulnerable and the monsters and whatever else is out there better know that. There's furniture everywhere like a bomb had gone off and he knows somewhere, deep down, he should feel guilty and scared. Guilty for what he has done, the lives he has taken and scared because of what he's done. What he is becoming. But between his heaving breaths and deep-seated apathy for anything but his family and the wants of the mark there is no room for any such emotions. 

The wooden floor digs into his knees but he can't find it in himself to care much. A small puddle of blood is forming, soaking his jeans a dark blue. The mark is singing to him. Finally sated though he knows it won't last long. Dean's breath hitches as he raises his head and looks at the four dead bodies around him. Their eyes wide open, mouths gaping. 

All the energy has gone from his body like the mark is drinking it in. Sapping him dry like a ravenous vampire. 

"Dean?" Cas swings the broken, white door open with an awful squealing of rusted and broken screws. The angel makes his way into the room but Dean only notices when a shadow is cast over him. Without thinking, he turns round with a snarl and lashes out with the knife. Thankfully, Cas dodges it and takes a smart step backwards, letting Dean realise that he's not in any danger or surrounded by enemies. Cas knows it's Dean's instinct. Shoot first, ask questions later and he doesn't blame him for nearly spilling Cas' guts all over the nice oak floor. 

"Cas?" The hunter breathes out as he slumps forward onto his knees again. This time facing away from the carnage. All he wants is a hot shower and a bed. The energy dissipating from him like mist rising from a pond or stream in winter. Suddenly, the angel is kneeling in front of him and grabbing his shoulders. Dean can feel the warmth coming from Cas' battle worn hands. 

"I'm so tired, Cas," Dean said as he collapsed further until Cas was the only thing holding him up off of the dirty, bloody floor.

"I know, Dean. I know" Cas replies as he hugs Dean. Castiel has blood smeared on his face like someone has gotten a sponge and dabbed it there but he doesn't mind. He just inhale's Dean's musty scent and tells himself that they will find a cure. 

"It will be okay, Dean." Cas murmurs as he rocks back on his heels and takes in the hunter's kneeling form. Too many times he had seen Dean kneeling and covered in blood, be it by his own hands or the hands of some other monster. (Because in Cas' mind's eye, that's exactly what he is. A monster who's hands are drenched in blood) and every single time it broke Cas' heart. "It has to be"


End file.
